Sometimes all we need is to hear the story of another to feel inspired to keep moving forward. Here is an inspirational poem by a fellow addict and how she came to begin her journey of recovery.
There comes a time in everyone’s life, when the curtain goes up and you finally get to see the truth of who you are. The good & the bad. You have to go inside and accept you’re wrongs, own them and let it go. Keeping the “good” qualities to build your authentic self. It’s definitely an inside job. I spent so much of my life running from my feelings, acting out on my emotions. Always believing my “feelings” were facts. It began to seem as if my unmanageability was spilling out all over the place. I would look around me, and back at past mistakes and I had created a land-mine. I knew if I made one more wrong move, it all was going to blow. One by one I had cut off most of my true friends, stop being a sincere part of my family, and sank deeper into self. I felt toxic, I blamed, I shamed, I coerced & manipulated others to meet my demanding and ever-changing needs. I was unhappy, depressed, anxious, fear driven & yes I felt everyone owed me. Slowly I started burning my bridges, or my pride wouldn’t allow me to speak the truth. Most of the time, I had no idea what that truth was. Yet, the Universe knew what I needed and wanted. It heard my heart cries and soul pleas. I admit, at first I didn’t like what was being dished out to me. I had no car, no home of my own, no job, hardly any personal possessions. I’d gotten rid of most of my belongings. I was the opposite of a hoarder, I wanted no attachments, they hurt too much. Well basically it boiled down to this, a comment my son once said about himself. I had nothing and I lost that. Powerful and true. I knew I didn’t have any answers. I was done, broken, shattered and worse, I almost didn’t care. That’s when these words came to me, “when you’re at your rock-bottom, and you implore on God for help and direction: you’re really at your beginning. Question was am I ready and willing to have God, as I knew him do for me what I couldn’t do for myself? Yes, yes and yes! I am ready. I now have hope, faith, and belief that I am worthy of love from all. That I can give love to all. I can ask for help and accept that help. I no longer feel like “humpty-dumpty”. I’ve been given a second chance at a life that I never believed existed. I am whole again. We are all our worst enemies, get vulnerable, make friends with yourself, love who you are, I know I do. One all are we. Each of us have different gifts and needs. One thing is certain, we can’t do life alone. We need each other and that includes every single beautiful miracle on this earth!
– Janey M.
The Other Side
93 E Berkshire Dr, Unit G
Crystal Lake IL 60014